Real Talk: Lessons Learnt Recently

Lately, I was thinking that nothing very exciting was actually going on in my life, its the same old thing week by week since I finished school. If I don't work during the day I stay in bed because I don't want to spend money, and the weekends mostly comprise of drinking at night and sleeping all day. Somehow that thinking got me on to thinking about what I'd been learning, what mistakes I'd made and probably won't be making again, whats been happening to make me realise that something probably wasn't a good idea. So now let me share those lessons that I've learnt, with you.

I mean I can tell you what I've learnt but for the most part I believe that you have to make your own mistakes to learn your own lessons, so its kind of like I'm just giving you the heads up for what might be coming your way.

Life lesson 1:
You can't rely on someone else for your happiness. 

The only person that should be in charge of your happiness, is you. You cannot let yourself become dependent on another person, no matter who that person is, for your happiness. You have to know how to be happy on your own, how to generate your own happiness, how to be independent, how to just be happy without the influence of others. You shouldn't allow someone the ability to dictate your emotions, that is all up to you. 

Life lesson 2: 
You have to put yourself first, always. 

This is preached to people so often and I'm beginning to see why. People talk about being selfless and basically putting people in front of yourself, I don't mean to contradict that and say that you shouldn't give a shit about other people, that is not what I'm saying at all. I'm saying you need to put yourself first, you need to give a shit about yourself. About your health, about your mental health, your well being, you need to take care of you first and foremost.If you can't look after yourself, how can you look after others?

Life lesson 3: 
Your parents and best friends will spot a dickhead before you do. 

I don't know what it is but it's like sometimes we're blindsided and can have a complete wrong impression of someone, you can think that a person is the best person in the world, and you're just completely wrong. All the while your mates and parents are sitting there watching like 'what is she doing?' because its seriously hard to understand how someone can just not see what another person is really like. I think if you like a person enough, I don't even just mean romantically, I mean in general, if you truly like someone enough you just don't see it, its like a selective thing and you see and hear what you want too. Good news eventually something will snap the string and it will all hit you like a brick wall that you've been wrong the whole time and probably should have listened to the people who know you best.

Life lesson 4: 
You can't force something that's not there. 

I think too often we believe in something or someone so much that we convince ourselves that if we work harder, or if we put in some more effort, that it'll be okay and that it will work out how we want it too. The truth in this is that if it's not there, then its just not there, and that could be so hard for someone to accept. You could be doing more damage if you're trying to force it, rather just accepting that its not going to work, and taking the steps to move forward from it. Perhaps if you realise early, something can be salvaged. 

Life lesson 5: 
Not everyone has the best of intentions.

Sometimes it can be difficult to tell what someones intentions are, they're not always clear and that can make it hard to establish if they really do have good intentions. The message that often is conveyed is that of believing the best in people and I believe that everyone probably has good in them but not everyone is a good person, not everyone has good intentions. For some people that can be hard to accept, you could spend so long believing that the intentions of someone were for good, only to have that belief thrown back in your face and that will obviously hurt. Maybe down low having a sneaking suspicion that someone could have bad intentions will reduce the blow.

Here we have it, five life lessons from someone who is obviously not qualified to give life advice, probably learn at your own risk. 

Until next time, stay lovely x