Lets Talk About Slut Shaming



 
I feel like slut shaming, now becoming such a "normal" thing isn't as understood and talked about in mainstream media as it should be. Which is why I am here to put it out there, right now, lets talk about slut shaming.

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What is slut shaming I hear you ask? Fantastic question! If you Google it, the answer you're likely to get is the following: "the process in which women are attacked for their transgression of accepted codes of social conduct." However that is a pretty shit description of what slut shaming actually is. Basically, if you want to be real about it, being slut shamed is getting labelled as a slut or a whore or a hoe because of factors such as how you choose to dress or how many sexual partners you have or have had. Lets give you an example, a young girl wheres a low cut top, you can see her breasts, she is called a whore by a random passer by- that is slut shaming. Or a young women who chooses to have more than one sexual partner is labelled as a slut- that is slut shaming. Does this make some more sense now? Yes? Yay!

Alright, I'm going to make a pretty bold statement here that could potentially get me into some trouble, but how sexist is slut shaming, it's so sexist! Okay, lets think about this way, the things that women are being slut shamed for, are things that for a male to do, will probably be celebrated. Lets weigh it up: a women has multiple sexual partners and is shamed for it, a man has multiple sexual partners, is slapped on the back for his good work and brought a beer by his bros. Equality, am I right?

Let's think about this: you dress modestly and you are labelled as frigid, you dress sexually and you're labelled as a slut. Can we, as women ever catch a god damn break, seriously? I think, men expect and encourage you to
dress sexually, to show off what you've got. Which is great, I mean I am all for dressing how you want, showing it off if you want to, the lower cut the top the better I say, if you're comfortable in it.. However, males have drawn up some ever changing line that if you cross you're no longer showing your sexuality and dressing "hot", you're dressing like a slut. Who says they get to make up this line? who let's them change where this line is drawn? Why is their even a line? Why are we dressing for the approval of a man?

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Don't get me wrong, I'm not here to tell you that the only ones doing the slut shaming are the males of the world, because lets be real, females can be just as bad as males when it comes to a good slut shame. So, why do women slut shame? Is it the mentality that if you are seen slut shaming another women you are less likely to be slut shamed yourself? Is it the need to be the superior slut? Or is it all just a ploy in a competition to win the approval of men? I have absolutely none of the answers to this one. 

Have you heard of the SlutWalk protests? Its a global protest against slut shaming, there was even one in Melbourne last year! Basically women (and men) protest in the walk wearing the "sluttiest", most revealing outfits they possibly can- I mean get out your mini skirts and fishnet stockings, don't even bother wearing a shirt, why? Because they damn well can. The protest is trying to call an end to to rape culture and say no you cannot use the physical appearance of a women to explain or excuse rape. The protest actually began in Toronto on the 3rd of April 2011 after a local police officer, Constable Michael Sanguinetti, who was giving a talk at York University on campus rape made the direct quote: "I've been told I'm not supposed to say this- however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimised." Basically, if you listened to this Constable, don't wear what you want to wear because someone might not be able to control their sexual urges.


So, I did some research on this. Somewhat not surprisingly I found many cases of rape that have been dismissed or excused, blaming the rape on how the victim dresses. Lets talk about some of them shall we?

Let me take you to 2006 in Canada, a man who raped a 26 year old women in the woods along a highway was not given even a day of jail time because of what the women wearing-her apparently provocative clothing and her apparently flirtatious nature, meant that forcing her into sexual intercourse without her consent was okay. Lets talk about what she was wearing, because the defence certainly took time to note it in their statement- the young girl was wearing "a tube top with no bra, high heels and plenty of makeup." WHAT. Let me be real clear- she was not asking to be raped because of what she was wearing.

In another case a women was told that her rape case would not be followed through because she was wearing Spanx underwear at the time she had been raped. Let me rephrase that one, a women who chose to wear Spanx to feel good about herself, which was hidden by her actual clothing, will not receive any type of justice for her raping because of her underwear. RIDICULOUS.

A women should not have to make decisions on what she is going to wear based on whether it is going to provoke a man to rape her. Shouldn't we be teaching men not to rape and not women to cover themselves up?

Slut shaming is something that needs to be stopped. We need to stop criticising women for their sexual habits. We need to stop criticising them for their clothing decisions. We need to stop victim blaming. We, as a society need to stop.

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